Tag: social life

Living in Ireland made me drink more to be accepted by my Irish friends

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Personal stories, The big picture

I am not Irish but I’ve been living here long enough to have an opinion about Irish society. I’ve realised living in Ireland made me drink more.

 

I was weak for not being able to drink more

When I arrived in this beautiful Emerald Island, I couldn’t drink more than 3 pints without feeling drunk and dizzy. An Irish friend made fun of me and called me weak for being incapable of drinking more than that. Now after 2 years living in this country, I am able to drink 10 pints and still stand on my feet without falling over.

 

I took the decision to stop drinking for a while

After some time, I realised I had adapted. I drink more. Irish habits were influencing me. It was affecting my life and not in a good way. I took the decision to stop drinking for a while. I realised I was able to reduce my pints consumption.

 

Society shapes us

Society determines what is considered good or bad, normal or not and has a huge impact on our social behaviour. It influences how we much we drink.

I realised the need to be a part of something, part of a society where I live can be strong enough to change my perspective and my beliefs. I had started drinking too much.

 

Why is the pub the main social activity?

It’s true that education, ads, laws and even the opening hours of shops, restaurants, can affect and influence how much we drink. For example, I’ve always wondered why after 6 pm, one of the only social thing going on in town is going to a pub where people drink alcohol. My options to get out of that vicious circle are very limited.

 

People drink too much in my country too, but there are differences

Don’t get me wrong, where I am from, people drink too but I see some differences

1. It’s not socially approved to see a drunk adult.

2.The amount of alcohol it is acceptable for each person to drink is lower.

3.Going out for a drink is usually reserved for the weekends, not during the week.

4.There are more things to do in the city, like night markets, ice cream stores, juice stores open until late. It is very common to go there in the evening for an ice cream and a nice walk with your partner, friends or family. I agree that the weather helps.

 

Little things can help us

A simple gesture like promoting street markets that open late can help. Have more free art events. Stop increasing the amount of pubs licences and places that can sell drink.  Providing new social activities that don’t require us to consume an addictive substance helps to have a healthier population. Creating a healthier society should be a top priority.

 

 

Editor’s Note

We’re near the top of the league  of 194 countries when it comes to binge drinking. Click here for more details.

Join the campaign to change this by signing our petition

if you’re worried about the risks of alcohol harm, try out our free top tips to reduce alcohol harm.

Bacardi Breezer did not suit my image anymore

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Social Life, The big picture

I can drink “like man”.  I can match any of the lads drink for drink, and I’ll still be standing at the end of the night. Intoxicated, but standing. On occasion I’ve even out drank my male counterparts. The night  ending with me holding their hair back instead of the other way around. For some warped reason, this is something I am strangely proud of. In the patriarchal society we live in today (Click here for “Don’t worry darling, you did n’t burn the beer” )  who wouldn’t want to have the ability to exert their capacity to exist as an equal, if only through alcohol?

 

When was the last time you saw a male clutching Bacardi Breezer?

When was the last time you saw a male clutching an alco pop? The neon blue of WKD or the sunset orange of a Bacardi Breezer doesn’t really match the male image. If you are what you eat, what does your drink say about you? A murky pint in a wide stocky pint glass is much more depictive of a tough, strong man. The dainty slender necked, intriguing west coast cooler bottle should be reserved for the feminine, classy, loving woman instead. Inadvertently we seem to be letting our drinking preferences typecast our roles and image.

 

I want to prove I’m on a par with the lads.

When I “prove my worth” doing rounds with the lads, I’m ordering pints on par with them. Even opting for a vodka and splash seems like a sign of weakness at times. Where have I gotten these notions from, that drinks themselves are gendered? The underlying notion of having my drink link into the image I want to project to the world is strangely intimidating. Are my beverage preferences really my own, or have they been shaped by society from the beginning?

 

I used to enjoy a Barcadi breezer

I used to enjoy a Bacadi Breezer. I thought my tastes were evolving, but was it just my personality adapting my taste buds to the image I  want to project to the world? I didn’t want to be seen as “weak” by choosing the “girly” options, so is that why I transitioned to stronger drinks? Exploring this train of thought is making me wonder if I really actually enjoy drinking. There may be a part of me that is only drinking to match a persona, to fit in with societal norms.

Yet if my choice of poison says so much about me, what do my actual drinking habits say?

 

I gave myself a hangover headache

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Social Life, The big picture

My friends had organised a night out to celebrate my birthday.  I wanted to have a few beers in the new restaurant we were going to. So when  we went to a cocktail place first  I had a really nice non-alcoholic cocktail. My friends know I’m a lightweight when it comes to alcohol and can’t mix drinks so this was n’t a problem. They know I get bad hangover headaches even when I don’t drink too much.

 

My hangover headache lasts a week

We got to the restaurant which we were visiting for the first time. Great atmosphere, just one problem. They only had a wine license. No beer. This was really embarrassing for my friend who had thoughtfully organised the night out in my honour.  All my close friends know I can’t drink wine because I get a massive hangover headache the next day. Red wine is particularly bad. A nuisance in many ways, but I believe my hangover problem has stopped me from   having serious problems with alcohol. When your hangover problem lasts a week (yes, that’s my record) and makes you feel severely depressed with constant nausea & vomiting you tend to drink less.

But when I saw my friend’s upset face, that she had n’t checked the restaurant served beer I decided to have a glass of wine. Knowing I was only having a single glass,  I said go for the red wine.  My  friends prefer red wine. So good humour restored, we had a really  lovely  enjoyable night.

 

I gave myself a hangover headache

The following day, after just a glass of red wine, I had a hangover  headache which needed painkillers. I cursed myself for deciding to take the glass of red wine just so I would not  upset my friend. I had n’t even enjoyed it. If I’m being honest, knowing my friend, once she saw me enjoying myself, her upset would not have lasted long and the slagging would have started.  But like many women do, I went into people pleasing mode.

 

Why are n’t you drinking?

The following Friday, another big night out for a friends 50th birthday. (Yeah I’m at that stage now) I told another friend I could pick them up as I was driving. I was faced with a barrage of questions

“why are n’t you drinking”.

Because of the previous week’s lesson with the hangover headache, I did n’t go into people pleasing mode. That plus the fact I had a lot to do on the Saturday meant this time  I stood my ground.

But it really struck me. How much alcohol is part of our lives. I don’t think any of my friends have an alcohol misuse problem. None of us are heavy drinkers. Yet, even in this group, I find myself constantly justifying not drinking.

 

Why are n’t you using grass?

“Alcohol is the only drug in the world where, when you stop taking it, you are seen as having a problem. The only drug in the work that you have to justify not taking”. (From Jason Veale) Nobody ever asks you why you are n’t using grass or ecstasy when you go out. Yet the harm  of alcohol abuse far outweigh the harm of   these other  illegal drugs.

 

Should I just give up drinking?

Would it be easier if I just tell everybody I’m giving up drinking altogether?  But I do enjoy an occasional beer, particularly with a meal so why should I?

I think I’ll try out a few of those non-alcohol beers, Lucy recommends and then decide.

 

Social life can make it hard to reduce drinking

So if you’re thinking of reducing your drinking, it’s really important to consider your social life.

Does your social life involve getting together over a few drinks and nothing else?  For many of us Irish, that’s the entirety of our social life. So you may need to plan different social activities which don’t involve drinking.

 

We’ll have a course on this shortly so sign up here, if you’d like to know when it comes available.